Neverending Grace
by MelancholicSerenity
Summary: A spark ignites between two performers.
1. Chapter 1

Now, bear with me, but I thought this would be an interesting plot to work with. But excuse for my lack of knowledge of the life of the performers and such, I'm really trying my best. I'm hoping there aren't too many mistakes and the wording doesn't confuse you guys. I hope to be abel to keep my inspiration for this story, and I would love some reviews with suggestions for future chapters. (: I don't own anything, ect.

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Never once have I fallen off my trapeze. Never. It was unthinkable, for anyone. My timing is always precise. It was my talent. An art I had mastered. Swinging trapeze. It wasn't difficult for me. Not one bit. I've been doing it for years. But today, I fell, falling hard on back onto the mats on the ground. I've never touched these mats. Only for a few seconds as I get on my trapeze and then I'm air borne, nothing able to bring me down. But not today.

Stares, I could feel them. They knew this had never happened before. I was trained and trained well. Yet here I was, staring up at my still swinging trapeze and the pain shaking my body. The shock caused my eyes to go wide and stare upwards, not registering that I should sit up.

What… What the hell happened?

"Sora… did you _fall_?" My brother's voice rang in my ears.

"I-I…" I stuttered. How was I supposed to answer? I never fell not once. Perfect performer, that's who I was.

"You're not hurt are you?" Vanitas suddenly exclaimed. Messing up was one thing, but being injured was another. No way would Xemnas let me perform if I was hurt.

My eyes went wide at the realization. I quickly stood back up, making sure I had broken something. I was fine, thankfully, but the shock was still with me.

"I'm fine. Just…" I looked at my trapeze. My trapeze. What could've cause my plunge to the ground? Was my timing off? Or was my trapeze starting to fail me, old and unusable? No that couldn't be it.

My brother, who looked at me with surprise, continued to ask e if I was hurt, but I was too out of it to answer.

"Sora!" He finally yelled, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"I made a mistake… that's all," was my answer. A mistake. I can't make mistakes. If I do, I could plunge to my death during a performance. No mistakes.

His forehead was still creased with worry.

"Won't happen today. Now go back to practicing," I ordered, wondering why my brother was practicing his imperfect hand balancing act.

Vanitas's expression became irritated. "Fine. Just be careful. You're good, but don't get cocky Sora."

I rolled my eyes as my brother walked away. Within seconds, I was back on my trapeze.

Swinging, swinging, getting as high as I possible could and then clearing my mind of everything, thinking ahead to every movement, every turn, twist, flip, and free fall which I would catch myself before plummeting to the floor. Yes, I was going to this right. Clear mind. No other thought besides me and my perfect trapeze act. Except…

Quite a distance away from me was the newbie, our flying man, a young silver haired boy, maybe just a year older than myself. And for the seconds I watched him, he was flawless, even if he was just practicing. He never looked afraid up on the bungee, he just owned it. Reminded me of myself and my trapeze. I was in complete awe, watching him practice with such grace, grace that seemed like it took years to master. Grace unlike my own. For that moment in which I was distracted, my foot slipped from my the bar, and I barely caught myself, pulling myself back onto my trapeze, my heart beating fast.

God damn it, what was wrong with me?

With a heavy sigh, I lowered myself from my trapeze. I needed a break. I was working myself too hard. I was being distracted. I needed time to focus and rest. Yeah, that's what I needed.

I walked towards my trailer, the one I shared with my brother, the one that I've lived in for 2 years, right out of high school. It was my home, at least more of home than I had before.

As I reached for the handle of the slightly rusted door, there was a hand on my shoulder.

"Hey are you okay?" The voice was smooth, calming, sweet sounding. The voice of a certain silverette.

"Yeah," was my answer, my oh so creative response as I turned around.

I looked at Riku, already irritated that he had distracted (albeit that was my fault for staring) but also the fact that I had to look _up_ at him when he was the _rookie. _

"Are you sure? That was quite a fall there." His voice was full of genuine concern. Why would this kid be worried about me? He was probably older than me, but still, I have the authority over him. Right?

"I'm fine." The sharp tone in my voice was probably uncalled for but I was just a little more than pissed. Mostly at myself. Why and how in the hell did I make not one, but two mistakes? How did I get so distracted?

Looking at Riku reminded me. His grace, beauty, his perfection… That had left me in awe and had caught my attention. And it wasn't just his act. Up close, I realized it was his being as well. His teal eyes looking at me with such a genuinely caring expression had left me almost breathless. Why was I being so rude to him?

"S-Sorry, I'm just kind of upset. I've never messed up before," I admitted, feeling ashamed of snapping at him.

A chuckle escaped his lips.

"Everyone makes mistakes, it's not a big deal." His smile was as breathtakingly beautiful as his eyes.

"But I can't afford to make mistakes." I really couldn't. This was the only thing I had. This circus was the only family I had besides my brother and it was one of the most amazing experience to be a part of.

"I need to rest, sorry for being so rude, I just really need to clear my head," I said, rushed, because all I wanted to do was get in my trailer and get this Riku out of my mind. He was gorgeous, but so distracting. I couldn't take an interest in him. No, he was my colleague, no way could I take any sort of interest in him besides friendship.

"Let's take a break together then. How about we get something to eat? I'm sure you must be starving from practicing so hard."

Eat? Food was the last thing on my mind. But why couldn't I resist his offer? Yeah, I've been practicing since 6 a.m. and it's almost noon, but honestly, I wasn't hungry at all.

"Sure, sounds good to me." I couldn't help but smile a bit. Just a tiny bit.

"Great." he said this with such enthusiasm that it surprised me. I would expect him to be at least a bit ticked off at how I had initially acted, even if I did apologize.

It was a rare occasion that I left the circus grounds, I always felt safer near the tents. Usually Vanitas would bring me food to eat at the end of the day because he knew I would go days without eating if he didn't. It wasn't restricted for us to leave. Xemnas didn't mind. He knew we worked hard and didn't care if we took 1 break or 100, just as long as our performance was as best as it could be.

But even so, I didn't feel the need to leave the grounds. That, and I just didn't feel comfortable away from the comfort of my one and only home. It just didn't feel right. It was hard for y own brother to get me to come along with him when he wanted to explore the town we were in for a bit. It was difficult, you could say. But without hesitation or any argument, I followed the silverette beauty I only first talked to moments ago.

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If you got to the end of this, I shall send you a big hug and kiss.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks for the reviews you guys (: Little heads up, I'll probably change POVs a lot. So, this is Riku's POV. As well, I'd like to point out that I'm trying to change Sora's and Riku's cliche personalities of a innocent boy and a tough guy. I'd guess I say you'll find out what both of their true natures are further into the story, but right now Riku is just a mess, imo.

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The small diner a few blocks away was empty. It was literally just the waitress on shift, Sora, and me. I wasn't sure if I should feel relieved or even more uncomfortable. Just speaking to Sora was a feat for me. Asking him to lunch was even harder, but I pulled through and I did it.

You could say I admired the young brown headed boy. Maybe I it was more than admiration. Because of this boy, younger than myself, I was determined to become as great of a performer and join him in the big top I've grown up watching.

I looked at the boy before me. He held himself in a way that showed his confidence and held himself above anyone else. But I could still see the young boy, looking no older than 20. He didn't speak much, instead he idly played with the salt shaker, waiting for the food we had already ordered to arrive. Well, lack of food.

I was surprised that he only ordered a glass of water. Just a fucking glass of water. No wonder he was such a skinny little thing! Didn't he ever eat? It upset me that this brunette beauty could possibly be starving himself! There wasn't much I could do. It wasn't my place to ask why or try to get him to eat. This is just his first encounter with me. Our first direct meeting.

I've known him for two years though. Since the first day he appeared in our popular circus show that originated in this little town and then grew and traveled all around. It was an elegant show, top notch performers and only human performers, wanting to stop the increasing animal cruelty in other shows. This circus was something I had grown up with, watching it with my father semi-annually from the age of ten. And each time I was amazed at how beautiful and graceful everyone was.

When my father passed away, I still went to the circus, never wanting to break the tradition and bond I had with him. And there he was. Confident, but still a kid. And he left me awestruck, amazed at how such a child could have so much talent.

He was the reason I trained so hard and why I strived to be part of this circus show. I wanted to be part of

something beautiful and something that brought some joy into peoples' lives. And to be close to the boy

who had me smitten at first sight.

"Are you sure you don't want to eat anything?" I asked, the silence killing me. Here was the object of my

affection, the boy who I've admired from a distance for so long, just sitting in front of me and I couldn't

even manage small talk.

"I'm not hungry," was his distracted reply. He didn't even look at me.

I tapped my fingers on the table. What could I say… What could I say? Other than 'I think I may love you'

which is what I truly believe.

"You know, before I was actually a part of this, I would watch the show every time it came around with my

dad?" It was lame, Sora probably didn't care, but it was _something._

His cerulean eyes finally looked at me.

"Really?" There was a smile on his rosy lips. "I did the same, only just with my brother. I'm guessing

you're from this town?"

"Yeah, this is the town where it Cirque Etonnement began." I smiled back. His voice was adorable and sweet. He was so adorable up close.

"I'm from a city not too far from here. Vanitas and I would ride our bicycles over here to see the show since they didn't perform back home." His beautiful smile seem to become very sullen, with almost a sad sparkle in his pretty eyes.

"My decision to become part of it was made when I was very young too. I self trained myself during my high school years so once I graduated, I could be part of the show I've loved for so long."

"I… I never would've expected you were self trained! From your first show, you've always been amazing, and I taught you'd been trained by a professional from a young age or something like that. That's really amazing Sora."

"I'm f-flattered." His round childish face blushed red. "Wait… you saw my first performance?"

Now, _I _was the one blushing.

"Yeah… You were great. Astounding." I tried my best to hide my face, but certainly he noticed my own embarrassment. Embarrassed why? Because I kind of sounded like a stalker when I said that. Yes I remembered his first performance. Of course I did. But he didn't need to know that. He probably thinks I'm a creep. Great.

"Thank you… That means a lot." His smile was so beautiful.

I was about to open my mouth to point it out, an impulse to tell him about his beauty, something I would of regretted saying if it wasn't that the middle aged waitress came by with our order.

A glass of water for Sora, the young brunette immediately muttering a thank you and taking sip and my own order, coffee and a toasted bagel. Why this took a while to get to us, I'm not sure, but it gave me a moment to talk with Sora, so I wasn't very upset. Still, the fact that the brunette was eating nothing annoyed me. I decided not to pester him about it.

The silence from before had returned, looming over us, suffocating any conversation. Was it my adoration of Sora? Or the fact that he didn't want to be around anyone, much less me? Or maybe I was just being paranoid and self conscious. He didn't seem to dislike me. But I could be wrong.

Goddammit Riku! I mentally cursed myself, biting into the dry bagel. I just ate, and sipped my coffee, until both Sora and I were done. Minutes had gone by, wasted moments with this boy I adored so much.

We stood up to leave, myself leaving the money to pay as well as a decent tip on the table.

Before I knew it, we were stepping out the door of the little dinner, and Sora just walked ahead, in front of me and I couldn't bring myself to move for some reason and just watched him walk, leaving me behind.


	3. Chapter 3

New chapter, yay. This goes back and forth in POV's LOL. First Sora, then Riku, then Sora again. yay.

reviews are loved 3

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I blocked him my mind and walked ahead when we departed from the diner. I would_ not _allow myself to fall for him. I already said I didn't need a distraction. No I would not let the silverette take over my thoughts. I wasn't going to allow myself to become vulnerable once more.

It was rude of me. Very unlike me. I didn't even say bye or thank him for the great lunch, or lack of. He looked so concern watching me just sip a glass of water. Dear God, he must think I'm starving myself. I have to go set him straight right now.

Shaking my head, I walked into my trailer. I couldn't do that. Facing him means falling victim to love once more. And I can not let that happen. I would avoid him, no matter what.

I crashed onto the small, but comfortable bed, not having the will or want to practice anymore. Instead there was an ache in my heart, thinking about how I would force myself never to see Riku again. Just a painful heartache.

A groan of frustration left my mouth and I buried my head into the pillow. It was too late. Too late. Once I stared into those cerulean eyes up close for the first time, I was captured, forever drawn to the silverette who enchants me so.

My memory recalls him, one of the faces in the stands as I performed for the very first time. Remembering how I felt like I was trembling with fear and as if I was going to fall and die. Even _he _couldn't comfort me. And I saw Riku's face, unfamiliar to me, yet giving me the strength to pull myself together and calming me. It was _him._ And now, here he was, distracting me with his beauty instead of soothing me. Here he was causing me confusion and frustration. Here he was, causing those stupid butterflies in my stomach that I swore I've felt before. But I remembered how the first time was a lie.

A stupid fucking lie. And I didn't want it to happen once more.

I have to be careful with Riku. I have to. I can't let my heart lie to me and give me false hope. Not again. No not again.

I felt tears pool in my eyes and I buried my head into the pillow even more, clenching the thin bed sheets and all I wanted to do was for sleep to take me. Just take me and not let me go.

The door of the trailer creaked open and my brother's voice broke the silence that would of soon been full of my sobs.

"Sora, why aren't you practicing…?" he asked, truly curious and not being able to feel the sadness choking me.

"I'm t-taking a break." My voice sounded broken. And he noticed.

"Sora, what's wrong?" he immediately questioned, shutting the door and taking a seat in one of our old chairs.

"It's nothing," I snapped, trying to get him out of here so I could wallow in painful memories and dream of a heart wrenching future that I'd get over eventually.

"Are you thinking about Axel again?"

The name was like an arrow to my heart.

"Don't… please don't." I hated that name. I didn't want that wretched fire dancer's name to be uttered around me. I hated even the fact that he was still here, still performing, still sleeping around… still being Axel.

Stepping back onto the carnival grounds, I felt a pair of eyes staring me down. Out of the corner of my eye, the redheaded fire dancer stopped and with his piercing green eyes stared at me, making me feel more than a little uncomfortable. His partner, a blonde girl with similar green eyes, stopped mid-routine, and scowled at him. She seemed to yell at him, but I was so out of it, I couldn't hear it.

Instead, I walked to my trailer, wanting some medicine for the headache that was slowly growing.

A hand roughly grabbed my shoulder and I was facing the red headed man. He was a good three or four years older than I, obviously an experienced performer, and just his appearance was intimidating and dazzling.

He stared me down, looking up and down, like he was observing me and I was starting to get a bit creeped out. What the hell did he want? I wasn't in the mood for this.

"Hey, I couldn't help but notice you were with Sora earlier," he said suddenly, his voice smooth and slick, but his expression told a different story that I couldn't quite interpret.

The name, although still slightly hurt by him, gave me a warm happy feeling at just the thought of the boy.

"Yeah. And may I ask who you are and why you care?"

He chuckled darkly.

"The name's Axel. Now how about we take a seat?"

He sat on the step to my trailer, blocking the door and waiting for me to sit down as well. I did, reluctantly.

The guy smelled of strong, musky smoke. Whether it was because he was a fire dancer or because he had a smoking habit judging by that nearly empty carton for cigarettes he was pulling out.

"Want a one?" he asked, holding out the carton to me.

I shook my head.

He took a draft and blew the smoke into the air and I crinkled my nose at the smell.

"What did you want to tell me about… Sora?" Saying his name was heavenly. Just the sound was amazing. But slightly saddening, the fact that he had so coldly left me. Not a single goodbye. Nothing.

We sat in silence for a little bit, Axel still smoking as he seemed to think about what he was going to say or how he was going to word it.

"Stay away from him," he simply said, puffing clouds of smoke.

Another silence. "W-Why?" I was dumbfounded. Why would he say that? What reason would there be to stay away from that brunette angel?

"He'll crush your heart into a million pieces." His face stayed calm, almost expressionless, tossing the cigarette to the ground and stepping on it.

I continued to stare at him, wide eyed.

He smiled, almost sad looking, but his eyes still seemed… devious. Untrustworthy.

"That Sora is no good. Sure, he might be the most beautiful boy you've ever laid eyes on, but…" "But what?" I wanted to yell at him. He was insane. Everything leaving his mouth was bullshit! It had to be…

"He's just a little whore. Can't stay in a relationship and even when he's in one, he continues to sleep around. He doesn't give a shit about anyone, not even his brother Vanitas. He's a tramp. He leads guys like you on. Guys like me."

Guys like him…? No way this guy had ever been with Sora! That was just… I couldn't picture it. And my dear little Sora… That precious brunette… He didn't seem like that. He wasn't like that. He held the image of an innocent and pure boy. I just couldn't grasp what Axel was saying. But he had no reason to lie to me. He knew Sora longer. He knew more than I thought he did. He knew more than I did.

"He'll just break your heart, so it'd be best to keep your distance. He doesn't love anyone. Never has, never will."

I felt like was going to cry, my heart pounding in my chest and my headache getting worse by the second. Suddenly, the information just sunk in, and it hit me like a train, leaving me crushed. What if I never had a chance from the start? I just couldn't even fathom the boy I had admired to much, the boy who I had dreamed about even more being that kind of person.

"Riku…" How he knew my name, I didn't know, but I heard the concern in his voice. Whether he really cared or not was the last thing on my mind. "I just wanted to tell you before you got hurt."

A choked sob racked my whole body and without a thought, I looked to Axel for comfort, holding onto him to keep me from falling to the ground, crying softly.

It was too late. I was already left heartbroken.

I needed to get out of this room, it was suffocating me in isolation. Even Vanitas had left me. I needed out.

My body ached from staying so unmoving, except for the occasional whimper of loneliness escaping my mouth. That loneliness, choking me and in that loneliness, I realized how much I didn't want to separate myself from Riku. How much I craved to be near him. How much I would risk, even if it left me hurt once more.

I was ready to get back to practice, ready to ask for his forgiveness, ready to befriend him at least. Maybe more. Hopefully more. I didn't think I'd be so fond of this rookie. But I was.

Confidence was now what I felt.

And I swung open the door.

My confidence, my shortly lived happiness, my everything, seemed to fall apart when I caught a glance of that redheaded devil.

And in his arms was a silver haired angel. Riku.


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